One person

Can one person really make a difference?  Is one really the lonliest?  I want to stop and think about that for a minute...

I mean, I know some people who are introverted, so therefore prefer most of their time on their own, but I can't honestly say I know ANYONE who never wants to be around ANYONE....Oh, I'm sure there are people as such, I just don''t happen to know any of them..... again... I digress.

So I have been spending a lot of time alone as of late.  I am not an introvert... I LOVE to be around people... that said, as of late, I have been spending a lot of time thinking.... what a dreadful pasttime don't you think?  Being trapped in my mind, the way it works, that's not such a great thing... but I have been thinking... mostly because honestly... I am in a REALLY bad place in my life... I am struggling with mental health issues, and just want to stop for a moment a lot of time.  Now... not one to back down from a challenge.... I have been foraging ahead and when something goes wrong, well I just fall down, get up, brush myself off and move forward...

That is SO hard sometimes... and knowing that I am alone and I am going to be doing these things and dealing with these problems alone, it seems to be very overwhelming.... So I sat down the other day and I just thought about it... and midst the tears and the negativity, a little thought occurred... a voice, as it were, that if i didn't have SO many things I am dealing with ALL at once, it wouldnt be so overwhelming, and I could keep looking forward and working toward where I need to go...

I know it isn't just me who rants to a friend or feels despair and have had their friend console them by saying it isn't "that" bad???  and don't you just wand to scream into the phone, online, in the face of your friend that it IS THAT BAD DAMMIT!!! so... in the interest of lessoning the "BAD" in my life, I thought to myself... if someone else could worry about X or Y I could figure out A or B... and then I thought about other people and the things that are going on for them... because though my life feels as though it is the center of the univers, I TRULY care about other people too.... anyway, I realized that many people in my life feel overwhelmed.. many people are at their wit's end... just feeling alone... I know how hard that is and what it feels like... so then I thought... I FEEL better when I meet someone else's needs.  I know when I can ease someone else's stress part of me.... deep inside... is happy.... even if just for a minute... just giving someone that second of relief from something that LIKELY feels huge... and from this... I devised a thought pattern....

Why not offer what I HAVE.... a skill, a minute, just something that someone else might just NEED and not have money to pay for.... just human interaction... a person helping another.... because... you see.... I have heard a lot about the 99% and that WE ARE the 99%... we do 99% of the work but control only 1% of the money... but.... why is it ALL about the money?  Wouldn't it be easier living in the 99% if it WASNT about that?  if you knew that you COULD find someone in your life to help you out?  Not always.. not on a constant basis... but just TODAY... when you are overwhelmed... just to take a couple of things of your plate RIGHT NOW...?  Wouldn't getting up tomorrow feel a little bit better?  Facing another day wouldn't be such a drain if you had 1 or 2 LESS things on your plate....

You know, when you fall on hard times, financially, have you ever noticed that you have certain friends who's homes you can invite yourself to for dinner?  why not be that home for someone in the new year?...

I read today, the following;

“I would like to say that according to the Mayan Calendar the 21st of December marks the end of the time and the beginning of no-time. It is the end of the Macha and the beginning of the Pacha. It is the end of selfishness and the beginning of brotherhood. It is the end of individualism and the beginning of collectivism… the 21st of December this year. The scientists know very well that this marks the end of an anthropocentric life and the beginning of a biocentric life. It is the end of hatred and the beginning of love. The end of lies and the beginning of truth. It is the end of sadness and the beginning of joy. It is the end of division and the beginning of unity.”

- Evo Morales, President of Bolivia to the UN General Assembly, 67th Session, 2012”

So.... I say... let's begin this brother/sisterhood... because i don't want to be alone all the time either and sometimes I need someone too.... and it's ok to admit that...